Sunday, November 02, 2008

Palin - unbelievably dumb, or what?

Oh noes! She's even dumber than we thought!

A Canadian comedy duo called The Masked Avengers from CKOI 96.9 FM in Montreal, pranked Sarah Palin, convincing her (and her team) they were receiving a call from French President Nicolas Sarkozy. The duo, Marc-Antoine Audette and Sebastien Trudel, are notorious for prank calls to celebrities and heads of state.

SP Assist = Sarah Palin's assistant
MA = Masked Avenger
SP = Sarah Palin
FNS = Fake Nicolas Sarkozy

SP Assist: This is Betsy.
MA: Hello, Betsy. This is Frank l'ouvrier (Frank the worker], I'm with President Sarkozy, on the line for Governor Palin.

SP Assist: One second please, can you hold on one second please?
MA: No problem.

SP Assist: Hi, I'm going to hand the phone over to her.
MA: Okay thank you very much I'm going to put the president on the line.
SP Assist: Ok he's coming to the line.

SP: This is Sarah.
MA: Okay, Governor Palin?

SP: Hellloooo... [long drawn out, like well, hellooooo]
MA: Just hold on for President Sarkozy, one moment.
SP [To someone in the room]: Oh, it's not him yet, I always do that. I'll just have people hand it to me right when it's them.

FNS: Yes, hello, Governor Palin? Yes, hello, Mrs. Governor?
SP: Hello this is Sarah, how are you?

FNS: Fine, and you, this is Nicolas Sarkozy speaking, how are you?
SP: Oh... so good, it's so good to hear you. Thank you for calling us.

FNS: Oh, it's a pleasure.
SP: Thank you sir, we have such great respect for you, John McCain and I, we love you and thank you for spending a few minutes to talk to me.

FNS: I follow your campaigns closely with my special American Adviser Johnny Hallyday [most famous singer in France, looks like and sings like Elvis], you know?
SP: Yes! Good!

FNS: Excellent! Are you confident?
SP: Very confident and we're thankful that the polls are showing that the race is tightening and--

FNS: Well I know very well that the campaign can be exhausting. How do you feel right now my dear?
SP: Ah, I feel so good. I feel like we're in a marathon and at the very end of the marathon, you get your second wind and you plough to the finish—-

FNS: You see, I got elected in France because I'm real and you seem to be someone who's real as well.
SP: Yes, yeah, Nicolas, we so appreciate this opportunity.

FNS: You know, I see you as a president, one day, you too.
SP: [Muahaaa...weird laugh], maybe in 8 years. Haha!

FNS: Well, ah, I hope for you. You know we have a lot in common because personally one of my favorite activities is to hunt too.
SP: [Giggle] oh very good, we should go hunting together.

FNS: Exactly! We could go try hunting by helicopter, like you did, I never did that.
SP: [Giggle]

FNS: Like we say in France, "on pourrait tuer des bébés phoques aussi" [Translation: We could also kill some baby seals.]
SP: [Giggle] Well I think we could have a lot of fun together as we're getting work done, we can kill two birds with one stone that way.

FNS: I just love killing those animals. Mm, mm. Take away a life, that is so fun!
SP: [Hahahaha]

FNS: I'd really love to go as long as we don't bring your Vice president Cheney, hahaha.
SP: No, I'll be a careful shot, yes.

FNS: You know we have a lot in common also except that from my house I can see Belgium. That's kind of less interesting than you.
SP: Well, see, we're right next door to other countries that we all need to be working with, yes.

FNS: Some people said in the last days, and I thought that was mean, that you weren't experienced enough in foreign relations, and you know, that's completely false, that's the thing I said to my great friend, the Prime Minister of Canada, Stef Carse [Stephen Harper is the PM and Stef Carse is a Quebecois country singer who covered Billy Ray Cyrus' Achy Breaky Heart in French in the 90s].
SP: Well, he's doing fine, too, and yeah when you come into a position underestimated, it gives you the opportunity to prove the pundits and the critics wrong. You work that much harder--

FNS: I, I was wondering because you are also next to him, one of my good friends, also, the prime minister of Quebec, Mr. Richard Z. Sirois [a famous Quebec radio host], have you met him recently? Did he come to one of your rallies?
SP: Uh, haven't seen him at one of the rallies, but it's been great working with the Canadian officials in my role as governor; we have a great cooperative effort there as we work on all of our resource development projects. You know I look forward to working with you and getting to meet you personally and your beautiful wife, oh my goodness, you've added a lot of energy to your country, even, with that beautiful family of yours.

FNS: Thank you very much. You know my wife, Carla, would love to meet you. You know even though she was a bit jealous that I was supposed to speak to you today. [Hahahaha]
SP: [Hahahha] Well give her a big hug from me.

FNS: You know my wife is a popular singer and a former top model and she's so hot in bed. She even wrote a song for you.
SP: Oh my goodness! I didn't know that.

FNS: Yes, in French, it's called "Du rouge à lèvres sur une cochonne" [Translate: Lipstick for a sow literally, but it also has the colloquial meaning of a slutty girl] or if you prefer in English Joe the Plumber, [sings] "It's his life, Joe the Plumber..." [reference to Bon Jovi song "It's my life"]
SP: Maybe she understands some of the unfair criticism but I bet you she is such a hard worker, too, and she realizes you just plough through that criticism like--

FNS: I just want to be sure, I don't quite understand the phenomenon "Joe the Plumber," that's not your husband, right?
SP: Mmhmm, that's not my husband but he's a normal American who just works hard and doesn't want government to take his money.

FNS: Yes, yes, I understand, we have the equivalent of Joe the Plumber in France, it's called, "Marcel, the guy with bread under his armpit", oui.
SP: Right. That's what it's all about, is the middle class, and government needing to work for them. You're a very good example for us here.

FNS: I seen a bit about NBC even Fox News wasn't an ally, an ally, sorry, about as much as usual.
SP: Yeah that's what we're up against.

FNS: I must say, Governor Palin, I love the documentary they made on your life, you know, Hustler's "Nailin' Palin".
SP: Oh, good, thank you. Yes.

FNS: That was really edgy.
SP: [Laughs] Well good.

FNS: I really love you. And I must say something, so, Governor, you've been pranked. By the Masked Avengers. We're two comedians from Montreal.
SP: Oohhh have we been pranked? And what radio station is this? [tries to force herself to sound nice but you can tell she's pissed]

FNS: This is for CKOI in Montreal.
SP: In Montreal? Tell me the radio station call letters!

[SP leaves phone, continuous griping in background, sounds like, "For chrissakes...that was ??? Just a radio station prank...chrissakes..."]

MA: Hello? If one voice can change the world for Obama, one Viagra can change the world for McCain.

[Man's voice in background: "hang up, hang up."]

SP Assist: Hi, I'm sorry, I have to let you go. Um, thank you.


Palin's prank call from fake French president

Audette posing as Sarkozy speaks in an exaggerated French accent and drops ample hints that the conversation is a joke. But Palin seemingly does not pick up on them.

He tells Palin one of his favorite pastimes is hunting, also a passion of the 44-year-old Alaska governor.

"I just love killing those animals. Mmm, mmm, take away life, that is so fun," the fake Sarkozy says.

Palin Gets Pranked by Canadian Radio Station - Mudflats:
In a prank call lasting about six minutes, Governor Palin believes she is talking to French President Nicolas Sarkozy. I guess Palin went "rogue." And obviously they don't vet their calls.

Palin pranked? Really? Ohhhhh nooooooo - SFGate:
For the love of God. "Joe le plumber"? Oy. Who could not see through this? If Palin's flacks are still employed by sundown, they should offer at least one limb as a personal sacrifice. This is incredibly lame.

Palin Pranked by Sarkozy Impersonator - Washington Post:
Two well-known Canadian pranksters tricked Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin into thinking she was on the phone today with French President Nicolas Sarkozy. The conversation, captured on a Montreal radio program, was, in a word, embarrassing.

The fake Sarkozy buttered Palin up by telling her he hoped she would president some day. "Haha, maybe in eight years," Palin replied.

Palin pranked - Joan Walsh, Salon
This is painful to listen to. You know I'm always in danger of feeling a little bit sorry for Sarah Palin. But she might have known she was being pranked by Quebec comedy duo Masked Avengers when a comedian posing as French president Nicolas Sarkozy talked about going hunting with Palin by helicopter, and exclaimed, "I just love killing those animals, taking away life, that is so fun!"

Palin hoaxed by comedy prank call - ninemsn:
She appeared unfazed by the fake president's thick French accent and some outrageous comments.

At one point the impersonator, comedian Sebastien Trudel, told the Alaskan governor he is following the US elections closely along with his special American adviser Johnny Hallyday - a famous French rock'n'roll singer.

When the fake president told Palin his wife Carla Bruni is "hot in bed", the governor chuckled and complimented him for his "beautiful family".

Comment On Dit, 'Prank Call'? - New York Times, The Caucus:
Speaking in an exaggerated French accent, the fake Sarkozy asked Ms. Palin about the state of the race, dropped names of nonexistent Canadian officials, frequently interrupted her mid-sentence and told her he saw her as president one day.

"Maybe in eight years," Ms. Palin said.

Palin, Amazingly, Takes Prank Call from 'Sarkozy' - Editor & Publisher:
This seemed like a viral joke but since the Palin campaign has confirmed it, must be true: That Quebec radio team, the "Masked Avengers," which specializes in prank calls to celebrities, somehow got Sarah Palin on the line and kept her there, one of them pretending to be Nicholas Sarkozy, for several minutes -- even as "Sarkozy" told her he wanted to go hunting with her in a helicopter (without Cheney) to "kill animals" and that his wife, Carla Bruni, was "hot in bed."

Palin Punk'd By Prank Call - ABC News:
Foreign relations never were her strong suit, so perhaps it's understandable that Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin actually appeared to believe that French President Nicholas Sarkozy would call her out of the blue to talk about "'unting" and "Joe le plumber."

Perhaps her first hint that it was actually a crank call should have been "Sarkozy's" admission that "from my 'ouse, I can see Belgium."

..."You know, I can see you as President one day," the caller cooed, in an accent like Pepe Le Pew.

Those evil Canadiacs/poor Sarracuda - Michael Tomasky, The Guardian:
Aside from everything else we could say about this -- nice staff work on the McCain campaign's part, eh? Jeebus.

Palin Takes Prank Call From Fake French President - New York Times:
Playing off the governor's much-mocked comment in an early television interview that she had insights into foreign policy because "you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska," the caller tells her: "You know we have a lot in common also, because... from my house I can see Belgium."

She replies: "Well, see, we're right next door to different countries that we all need to be working with, yes."

When Audette refers to Canadian singer Steph Carse as Canada's prime minister, Palin replies: "Well, he's doing fine and yeah, when you come into a position underestimated it gives you an opportunity to prove the pundits and the critics wrong. You work that much harder." Canada's prime minister is Stephen Harper.

Palin's French Hoax Call Faux Pas
- Sky News:
The Vice-Presidential candidate failed to realise it was a prank even when the fake French leader refered to his special US advisor, Gallic pop legend Johnny Hallyday.

The Canadian comic also said the French first lady Carla Bruni was a big fan of Mrs Palin and had penned a song for her, the title of which translates as 'Lipstick On A Pig'.

Again the penny failed to drop.

Mr Audette told Sky News: "We wanted to know if she knows anything about foreign relations and as you can hear, that is not the case."

Comedy duo prank-call Palin - CNews:
In an over-the-top accent, one half of a notorious Quebec comedy duo claims to be the president of France as he describes sex with his famous wife, the joy of killing animals and Hustler magazine's latest Sarah Palin porno spoof.

At the other end of the line? An oblivious Sarah Palin...

...Throughout the conversation, Audette drops plenty of clues that something's amiss.

He identifies French singer and actor Johnny Hallyday as his special adviser to the U.S., singer Stef Carse as Canada's prime minister and Quebec comedian and radio host Richard Z. Sirois as the provincial premier...

...In an interview Saturday, Audette told The Canadian Press it wasn't easy setting up the interview with Republican presidential candidate John McCain's running mate, and described the accomplishment as the pair's biggest triumph to date.

"It really took a lot of work," he said.

"We had to go through the Secret Service, the people in her entourage. It's the biggest coup so far. We're proud to add (this prank) to our top hits."

It took the pair, known for securing surreptitious interviews with celebrities, politicians and heads of state, five days to set up the call, Audette said. The secret to getting powerful people on the line? Time and persistence.

"I wanted to see how (Palin) was on an intellectual level," Audette said, comparing the latest prank to the duo's crank call with pop idol Britney Spears.

"You can see that she's, well, not really brilliant."

Good lord. You really couldn't make this stuff up.

So - from this phone conversation we learn that:
  • Palin's assistants must be pretty worried about their jobs right about now. I'm stunned that these guys managed to get through!

  • Palin apparently takes phone calls from heads of state without running it by the boss first.

  • Palin flirts with heads of state.

  • She really really likes Nicolas Sarkozy - to the extent of almost sounding fangirly when she's talking to him. Not very statesmanlike, is she?

  • Palin is easily taken in - imagine if she got the 3am phone call! Or a phone call from someone instructing her to press that little red button... yikes!

  • Palin has no idea about French popular culture (didn't get the Johnny Halliday reference).

  • Palin has no idea of the name of the Prime Minister of Canada (it's Stephen Harper, not Stef Carse).

  • Palin has no idea of the name of the Premier (Prime Minister) of Quebec (it's Jean Charest, not Mr. Richard Z. Sirois).

  • Palin doesn't speak or understand French (except maybe "rouge cou").

  • Palin doesn't disagree with FakeSarkozy's suggestion that they go hunting by helicopter, even though Alaskan law only allows state employees or licensed individuals to shoot from an aircraft for the sake of protecting "land, water, wildlife, livestock, domesticated animals, human life, or crops" - in other words, it's illegal to do it just for fun.

  • Palin doesn't know that Nicolas Sarkozy does not speak fluent English, and that he and Carla Bruni do not have any children together (Palin refers to "that beautiful family of yours").

  • Palin is open to becoming President in 8 years' time. Double yikes!

  • Palin apparently thinks even Fox News is against her now (she says "Yeah that's what we're up against" when FakeSarkozy says he hears Fox News isn't an ally as much as usual).

  • Palin is apparently sooooo stupid that when FakeSarkozy says "I just love killing those animals. Mm, mm. Take away a life, that is so fun!" and "from my house I can see Belgium" and "she's so hot in bed" and "Marcel, the guy with bread under his armpit" and even "Hustler's "Nailin Palin"" - she STILL doesn't twig she's being punk'd.

OMG. Also.

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